It’s the time of year where occasionally a group of friends gets together to go play some golf. Maybe you’re staying at a golf resort, maybe you’re just meeting up at a course for a round, maybe you’re camping…it doesn’t matter what the other circumstances are. And these weekends are integral to the mental wellbeing of the individuals involved and to the collective mood of the group. So if you’re going for a golf getaway sometime soon, consult this checklist before you hit the first teebox.
You gotta make sure you got your sticks. This includes all your clubs, your ball retriever, your towel, your range finder, and your shoes. Don’t forget the shoes. It’s important to make sure you’re not going to slip and fall trying to kill a drive.
Nope, more than that. More than that. There you go. This isn’t the PGA or some huge tournament where they might have a rule as to how many golf balls you’re allowed to have with you. You play less than 20 times a year, so just take as many balls as you want. It’s better to have way too many golf balls than it is to run out and have to make the humiliating trek back to the club house to buy an overpriced sleeve of Pinnacles.
Especially if you’re in a hot state like Arizona or Texas. Bring some SPF 30 and apply every six holes. And don’t let some macho crap prevent you from doing this. Skin cancer is very real and no man is more badass than the freaking sun. You fight the sun, you’ll lose every time. Just bring the damn sunscreen.
One Work Anecdote
This is the first of the anecdotes you’ll need to have handy. This one is from work, it’s about someone/something the other guys you’re playing with don’t know anything about, and will provide the opportunity not only for the original story, but perhaps follow up questions and side stories that get everyone involved.
One Home Anecdote
Of course, you also need a non-work-related story. This one should involve people your buddies know so they can get a good chuckle as they picture the subject(s) of your story doing whatever they did to create the situation in the first place.
More than that. A lot more than that. However much you planned on taking a week ago, double it. Remember, it’s not all just for the course. Some of it is for the parking lot after the round, and some of it is for wherever you’re staying for the weekend. Plus, what’s the worst that could happen? You have leftover beer? Boo hoo.
First, you gotta decide what direction you’re going here. Are you going with the wannabe PGA guy with a Titleist or Callaway baseball cap? Are you going with some SWAG from your work? Are you going with your alma mater or local sports team you support? Are you going with some novelty thing like a “Bushwood Country Club” hat? Or are you gonna swing for the fences and go with a straw hat with a tropical band? Whatever you decide, grab that hat and stick with it.
Arsenal of Golf Movie Quotes
And finally, you must have an arsenal of golf movie quotes. Caddyshack and Happy Gilmore should for sure be represented. I’m a big fan of Tin Cup, so I like to sprinkle in some of those. Maybe even something from The Legend of Bagger Vance. Either way you must have something ready.