There’s Nothing Better Than Winter Golf (So Far This Year)

Well, not quite. Winter golf, by and large, is awful. Cold weather, howling winds coming from the north instead of the south like you’re used to, numb fingers hurting after off-center impact, losing your ball in the great gold-and-white expanse of dead grass on the fairway, and a general lack of warming drinks like bourbon and brandy available on the beer cart.

Now look, I don’t want anyone being pedantic and telling me that winter doesn’t begin until later this month. Technically that’s true, but if you ask any random person to name the winter months, December will be part of the answer. For the purposes of this article and the sentimentalities contained herein, we’re considering the full month of December as belonging to the winter. And really that should probably be pushed back even further to Thanksgiving or so, but no one consulted me when making the seasons, so there you go.

But the point is that normally, winter golf is awful.

WINTER GOLF!!!!!

So far this year, all of three days into “winter,” the temperatures have been mild here in Dallas. In fact, today is projected to be a whopping 19 degrees above normal. And yeah, I’m sure that means that somewhere a penguin is struggling and polar bears have a smaller hunting ground, and that is tragic and must be addressed. But for those of us who don’t normally play much golf this time of year, it’s great.

It hit 80°F in Dallas yesterday. Eighty degrees. I was half tempted to throw on a tank, fire up the grill, and put on some douchey summer-themed country music like Kenny Chesney just to celebrate the fact that I didn’t need a pea coat. Okay, that’s a huge exaggeration; there is no circumstance where listening to Kenny Chesney is appropriate. I’m very sorry if I misled you there.

But still, you get the idea. And the golf courses in this part of the world are still beautiful. Green fairways, consistent greens, soft tee boxes, and no real threat of rain—or at least not until Sunday morning. I mean, look at this forecast. Other than the possible rain on Sunday, the next week looks great. Even the 56° predicted for Monday probably won’t be all that bad because it will be sunny.

And I know it won’t last. Nothing, good or bad, ever lasts too long in this life, and these mild December days are both good (golf, low electric and gas bills) and bad (penguins and polar bears). Plus, Tiger Woods is back and taking full swings. What could be better news for golfers and golf fans? It’s unreal.

But look, I’d love to write more but I actually have a 10:52 tee time and I need to hit a bucket because it’s been way too long since I played a round. Happy golfing, everyone.

1 thought on “There’s Nothing Better Than Winter Golf (So Far This Year)”

  1. Pingback: Quick Hits, Vol. 45 - CosasTotum.com

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